she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
Randomize
