She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
Randomize
