textsfromlastnight.com keeps rejecting me
that alone proves you never get laid, nor have a life.. or have anything funny to contribute to the world.
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
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