The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
Hippo gnu deer
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
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