You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
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