# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
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