Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize
