Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
Randomize
