k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
Randomize
