Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
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