So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
Randomize
