Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
Randomize