Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
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