I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
I think a kid would responsible me up
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
