Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
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