Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
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