but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
Randomize
