Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
Randomize
