your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
You attempted what you called the "Long Island Heist", in which you shoved a half glass of Long Island down your pants and asked me to help you sneak it out. That drunk.
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
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