...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
So far today I've found 3.5 million dollars in savings. Pretty sure management is gonna start buying me hookers if getting laid has this much payoff
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
Randomize