I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
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