so that wasnt chicken after all
On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
A university police officer just hhigh fived me when i drunkenly stumbled into Aderhold. Fucking 5 o'clock somewhere.ITS IN CASABLANCA RIGHT NOW! TIME ZONES!
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Randomize
