i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
...i apologize for hitting you up so much tonight im just kinda in a little pickle. im going to sleep in my car near u so pretty plz lmk if you head home...
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
We have an albino peacock in our apartment. It's beautiful.
Scratch it being beautiful, bitch just stole my McDonalds. Call animal control.
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
Randomize
