a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
Shame - the story of my life.
Randomize
