But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
Randomize
