im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
I'm way too hungover for life right now
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
Randomize