yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
Randomize
