so that wasnt chicken after all
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
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