I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
Randomize
