She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
Randomize
