He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
Randomize
