Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
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