my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
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