I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Randomize
