I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
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