i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize