i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
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