I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
That cute girl I hooked up with last night clawed my back to hell and gave me a hickey. I look like a white trash warewolf victim
If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Randomize