He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
Houston, we have a blender
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
the worst part about living alone is not having other peoples snacks to mooch off of when you havent gone grocery shopping in three weeks. i'm so pms-y i'm about to eat a soy sauce packet
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
Randomize
