I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
NEW RULE: can't hook up with more than 50% of the groomsmen in wedding party or it becomes wrong kind of weird. NUMBERS GAME.
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
Randomize
