It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
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