last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
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