OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Randomize
