i always forget guys have bellybuttons
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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