Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
soo... how was my night?
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Randomize
