Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
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