I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
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