I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
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