i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
Randomize
