4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
I feel like abortions should bother me more
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
She set fire to my carpet trying to power-dry puke covered cigs with Josh's blowtorch. How she found it in the garage is beyond me but if you bring her with you again I'll shoot you myself.
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
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