Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
Randomize
