I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
Randomize
