PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
Dude, I totally just made my launch phrase on my new phone "Wingardium Leviosa" so that when people try it and it doesn't work I can say, "It's leveeOHsa, not leveeoh-SA."
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
Randomize
